Maybe you can’t go home again

Let’s face it, Facebook is an amazing thing. The ability of a social networking site to bring people together is incredible. Being able to reconnect with old friends and colleagues, and to become more closely connected with new friends and colleagues is a great thing.

But there’s also a bit of Facebook that makes me think the adage, “You can’t go home again” is true. I’ve reconnected with a few high school classmates, some former colleagues and friends who, at the time, I never thought I’d lose touch with, but did.

This morning I got caught in the Facebook trap and spent a lot more time on it than I ever intended. It was because of a friend suggestion someone made about another person — a person I didn’t recognize and couldn’t remember. So I spent some time looking through my senior high school yearbook to find this person and jog my memory.

That search got me thinking about the people from high school and what they’re up to now. I doubt anyone would guess what’s happened in my life since we donned those dorky caps and gowns back in 1985. So, I figured, it would be nice to reconnect with comrades from Waterford Mott High School and see what they’re up to.

So I did a Facebook search for those who have listed themselves as being from my alma mater. I didn’t find any. I don’t think I did, anyway. There are a couple of people listed that I remember from my senior class — but we’ve already found each other on Facebook. There were a couple of people who I thought might be someone I remember, but their name isn’t unique enough to prove it’s really them, and their pictures are of people at least 20 years older than the last time I saw them. (To be fair, anyone looking for me might trigger on the unusual name, but my on-line persona is a green peanut M&M, so I’m not helping other searchers out, either.)

What I did discover while searching for Mott alumni was the following, in no particular order:

• People on Facebook really should think twice, and maybe three times, about what they use for their picture. (Says the guy who looks like a green peanut M&M – yeah, whatever, deal with it.)
• The current students at Mott seem to have a flair for posting pictures of themselves that have more shock value than most. (Here’s hoping they take them down before looking for a job…)
• “I can’t believe that’s what ____ looks like now!” (Assuming that’s really them.)
• I wonder what people think when they see my page and get a glimpse of my life when they search for Waterford Mott alumni.
• This is depressing — people that graduated back in the 1980s look older than seems possible and people going there now all look so, well, young. (Yeah age is a perception thing, but it also can be a slap-in-the-face reality check when you least expect it.)
• Maybe you can’t go home again.

That last bullet point may seem depressing, and I don’t mean it to be. But the reality is “home” isn’t there anymore. Now, granted, I moved around a lot as a kid, so I don’t have the type of hometown feeling that someone like my fiancee might, because she grew up in the same house in the same town, and her parents still live there. She “goes home” all the time.

Maybe it’s better to think another old saying really is true, too. “Home is where the heart is.” I have a wonderful fiancee, I have two beautiful kids. I have a great job, I have a nice house. I like the community I’m living in and have wonderful friends here. This is where I belong. This is where I am happy.

Maybe the issue is that “you can’t go home again” is misleading. Perhaps we don’t need to “go home,” because home comes to you.

That sounds better and a lot less depressing. OK, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

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